I understand you 100%. Writing an essay is hard work, it’s not for everyone, but there’s no shame in it. It is better to spend time on something that can really be useful to you and in which you can be useful. That’s when it’s time to seek professional help. I use do my essay for me all the time, and it’s always been a great experience. Your essay was as good as it gets!
This has always been a headache for me. The main reason is that I have never been able to express my thoughts coherently. Sometimes I searched the Internet for similar papers, but they were never as good as what I could create myself. I’m sure you can do it too! Give it a try like I did.